12 Reasons Why You Should Never Own A Dachshund

You would be a little crazy to allow a Dachshund into your life. Here’s why.  😉 

Red Dachshund Puppy on Porch

1. You Can Never, Ever Find A Cute Dachshund Puppy Anywhere

Long Haired Miniature Dachshund Looking out a Window

2. They Don’t Really Care about You Or When You Get Home

dachshund dog and puppy

3. They Make Terrible Moms’

Dachshund Puppy

4. And – If They Aren’t Cute When They’re Puppies – Then they Only Get Worse As They Get Older!


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5. Why Is It They Never Listen To You?

more than one

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6. The Very Worst Thing You Can Do Is Have More Than One!

more of them

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7. Or Even More Of Them!

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8. They are Definitely Not Interested In Keeping You Company Where ever You Go!


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9. Nope! Still Can’t Find A Cute Puppy Anywhere


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10. You’ll Never Catch Any Self Respecting Dachshund Taking A Bath


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11. A Dachshund Will Never Know How to Look Cool


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12. They’ll Never Make You Laugh

You know this is tongue in cheek, don’t you? We absolutely LOVE Dachshunds, so much so we have 3.  😀

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124 thoughts on “12 Reasons Why You Should Never Own A Dachshund

    • diane says:

      I have had doberman’s boxer’s and now a doxie. I love him soooo much. I will never get any other breed again. Mine is a minature long haired. He is on a diet now and not happy. Only 3 treats a day instead whenever he want one. He weights 14 pounds and should only be 11 pounds. He still loves me just the same even through the rough cut back.

  1. Louise says:

    I have a dachshund and wouldn’t gave him up for all the money in the world he is my baby.He sleeps in my bed with me if i am not home he comes runing to the gate when i come home he is the most lovable dog you could have and i love my little Rebel!!!

  2. Cindy says:

    Ours is a diabetic alert service dog and has saved my wife several times . just doesn’t dig the alaska snow and cold

  3. Leann Wenger says:

    Horse shit. What a big fat lie. My dachshund loves me and is totally happy to see me when I get home. He is the biggest lover just like my first one. They both love there human mommy.

    • Dogs Online says:

      it’s a little bit of satire. We wanted to say how wonderful Doxies are, but we wanted to do it with humour. So we made the pictures tell the truth and the words opposite. Sorry you misunderstand

    • Leann Wenger says:

      OK because both of my dachshunds have been wonderful lovers and mama’s boys. I had to put my 14 year old baby down due to kidney failure and her was having a massive stroke, that was in October the 28th. I spent 3 weeks in bed crying all the time, as time passed I kept looking for on and there wasn’t any. I never stopped looking, the I found my new baby doxie the start of December and got him right before Christmas at 7 1/2 weeks old and today he is 8 months old that is him in the picture below.

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